So D-Day had come...the day when we would begin dismantling my mother and father's home, the house I had grown up in since I was 10. All of the preparations had been made, the dumpster ordered, the car moved, the necessary packing & storing cartons in place. We were ready for the daunting task in front of us...or so we thought. Our kids had arrived from Portland, Oregon on Wednesday afternoon, December 9th. They were "in charge."
Our daughter is an efficiency expert, an industrial engineer by trade along with possessing excellent managerial skills and being able to delegate with great authority. Our son in law is also quite proficient in these areas as well as being strong, hard working and efficient with moving, sorting and loading. Needless to say...they were the team leaders. Now that certainly doesn't mean that they didn't get down and dirty...they did quite a lot of that. In fact they were so smart as to buy cheap white t-shirts that they threw away at the end of each day. We had gloves, masks and other protective equipment to wear. Houses can collect quite a bit of dust, dirt and mold in 47 years.
K&G had a lot of the garage cleaned out by the time we arrived early Thursday afternoon. To say my father is a pack rat would be putting it mildly. We found multiple copies of newspapers dated from when JFK was assasinated, when Nixon resigned and many other historical events. My father had been president of every oranization he ever belonged to....and there were quite a few. Sometimes I think he spent more time running the Rotary or the dance club or the blood board than he did working at his real occupation. So he had saved minutes and notes and an assortment of documents pertaining to all those organizations. What were we to do with all of those? Luckily, K&G had the foresight to rent a truck for all of the hauling expeditions.
Everything possible was taken to the local recycling facility....papers, cans, glass, plastic, cardboard....even aerosols. My father is adamant about recycling, but didn't always have the resources or necessary transportation to make sure his items were transported. So we handled all of his recycling for him. He would be proud and applaud those efforts. One minor problem arose in keeping my father away. Nobody wants to see their precious treasures or memories being thrown away, donated or moved, especially after just losing their beloved wife. So it was easier for us to just make decisions and press on. Since my father isn't driving anymore due to his bad eyes, we were able to accomplish that most of the time. We brought him over a few times and other friends did also, but it just upset him and slowed us down. So we discouraged that.
Now my father kept saying, "One man's trash is another man's treasure." And while that might be true in many instances, it is not always true in my father's circumstance. With his poor vision, he could not see all the "trash" he had accumulated in recent years. A person isn't likely to throw things away if he can't see what they are. He is afraid it might be something important. So in my father's case....one man's trash is another man's trash. We had little direction from my father on what to keep and what to dispose of other than finding and keeping 2 things he wanted for sure. We had already moved the majority of his belongings to his new "digs." If he had given us other directions, they would have been to save everything. Obviously that was not possible. So we moved onward and upward donating and recycling as much as possible.
One lucky break was that the trash was going to be collected the following day. So we were able to dispose of many garbage bags and several very badly worn pieces of furniture that way. We also donated quite a few items and food to the local schools to be used for their classes, education programs and food drive. With a huge orange dumpster in the driveway and people working almost around the clock, neighbors couldn't help but notice us. Many stopped and offered support and kind words about my mother. My parents had been fixtures in the neighborhood for quite some time.
There was a massive amount of "stuff" to be gone through and at times we thought we would never finish, let alone on time. After all K&G had to fly back to Oregon on Sunday afternoon and we had to return to Dallas. I for one was especially skeptical about if we could accomplish our task....meet our goal/deadline. Several other relatives came and helped out for a few hours several days, but far and away the overwhelming majority of the task was accomplished by K&G. Chris and I did our fair share, but nothing close to the 2 chiefs. They even said if another grandma died the next week, they would go clean out her house. That's just what family does....and right they are. So here's to K&G for their unwavering support, help, time, energy and hard work.
So after 4 1/2 long days, one 30 cubic yard dumpster filled, 14 trips to Goodwill (with a huge truck filled with items), 18 trips to recycling and 120 garbage bags filled we achieved our goal...or at least close to it. Our earliest morning starting work was 8:00AM. The latest night was 11:30PM. I brought home hundreds and hundreds of pictures, family documents, heirlooms, furniture and boxes that will take me a year to go through. Some items I will place in albums, some I will give to the other side of my mother's family and some I will save for the next generation. It is not easy to throw away treaures of people you have known and loved. I'll leave that for the future. There were still a few things left in the house.....some that my father would pick up later, some that my father wanted to store for a while, but overall I would say, "Operation Clean Sweep on ______ was accomplished."
Now it was time for the painters and other workers to come in and prepare the house for the next family. They will be making it their home and filling it with their treasures and memories. We will not forget that house or our memories, but it was time to move on. Soon I plan to blog about my father's first Christmas without my mother and how we worked feverishly and tirelessly to keep him entertained, occupied and his mind on happier things. So please visit our website at www.hereforyouhomecare.com again soon. Call our office at 214-389-9401 if we could help your family with caregiving.
Thank you for listening/reading,
Jan
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